just tell him i said nine months
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Randomize
