my vag is so smooth its legendary
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
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