Pappa wants mamma naked
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
