oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize
