My brain says no but my pants say off.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
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