Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
