drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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