I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
