that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Go christen that room with your naked body.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Randomize
