we have pet lesbian snakes
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
