Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
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