is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
