i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize