whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
