we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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