those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
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