Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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