is your mom at the bar?
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
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