i need an iv and a liver transplant
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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