a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
i think i have herpe
just one?
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Randomize
