But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
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