lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Randomize
