hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
is this the sara with the beer cane?
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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