I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize