considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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