i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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