Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Randomize
