at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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