I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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