what day is it and did you see me today?
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Randomize