I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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