I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
