Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
So much rum. So many feels.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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