Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
