Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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