One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Randomize
