wrigley field is MILF paradise
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
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