I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
