Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
