D3 body, D1 cock
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize