But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I seem to have left my pride at pride
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
soo... how was my night?
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
