dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
she looked like the before picture.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Randomize
