he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
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