Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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