just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize
