He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
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