dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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