It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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