i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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