I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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