I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize
