yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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