he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
